Thrive 4 Pillars : Building The Foundation
Purpose: The four cornerstones to Thrive aren’t just sequential tasks — they are pillars of transformation. They are foundational work that must be established and maintained.
When individuals begin to struggle, stall, or feel spiritually distant, it’s almost always because one of these four areas has been neglected or misunderstood. Thrive is about more than recovery — it’s about abundant life in Christ.
Pillar 1 — I Can’t.
“Became willing to admit that I am powerless to overcome, make peace with, or manage my issues.”
The truth:
I’ve reached the end of myself. I’m not as in control as I thought.
The grace:
I don’t have to keep pretending I am.
This first step is more than a behavioral acknowledgment — it’s an invitation to face our story, our pain, and our survival strategies. We’ve tried to fix, manage, control, numb, or avoid our pain — and it hasn’t worked. Freedom begins with honest acknowledgment.
Core Realities Explored Here:
What led me to this place?
What experiences or trauma shaped the way I view God, myself, and others?
What filters do I now see life through as a result of my past?
What survival responses did I develop?
How did I compensate, numb, or “empower” myself to cope?
How did those responses help me survive — and how do they harm me now?
Reflection Questions:
What am I still trying to control?
What am I afraid of losing if I admit I can’t manage this?
What conditioned beliefs or reactions have become default responses in my life?
Do I face my pain honestly — or hide from it?
This step is about understanding the roots of our struggle so that healing addresses cause, not just symptom.
Pillar 2 — God Can.
“Recognize that God is in control and has a plan for my life that’s far superior to anything I can imagine.”
The truth:
I need more than insight — I need intervention.
The grace:
God not only sees me — He’s still writing my story.
After acknowledging we can’t fix ourselves, this step invites us to believe that God can — and will — use it. This is not naive optimism. This is the Genesis 50:20 model: what was meant for harm, God intends for good.
God doesn’t just repair what’s broken. He redeems it, repurposes it, and can and WILL use it to bring healing to others.
Core Realities Explored Here:
Do I believe God is good even when life hurts?
Has my pain shaped a distorted view of God’s character?
What beliefs about God came from people who failed or hurt me?
Could the pain I carry become a platform for compassion and healing?
Reflection Questions:
Where do I still doubt God’s goodness or control?
What part of my story feels too broken to be used for good?
Am I willing to trust God with my past — not just for forgiveness, but for purpose?
This step restores hope and purpose, reframing suffering in light of God’s power to redeem.
Pillar 3 — Let God.
“Become willing to allow God to not just serve as my Savior but to actually rule and be the Lord over my life.”
The truth:
Surrender isn’t weakness — it’s wisdom.
The grace:
The One I surrender to is safe, holy, and good.
This step moves us from belief to obedience. It’s one thing to know Jesus as Savior; it’s another to let Jesus be Lord — the One who leads, shapes, and transforms us daily.
We stop letting fear, control, self-reliance, or old coping strategies sit in God’s seat. We allow God’s wisdom to direct our responses, decisions, relationships, identity, and habits.
Core Realities Explored Here:
What areas of my life have I not fully surrendered?
Where do I still try to “sit in God’s seat”?
What survival mechanisms do I cling to because they feel safe, even when they harm me?
Reflection Questions:
What parts of my life am I still controlling?
Where do I fear letting God lead?
What beliefs or old responses need to be surrendered so God can heal and renew me?
Surrender here is not defeat — it’s freedom through alignment with God’s will.
Pillar 4 — Connect Daily.
“Committed to building daily rhythms of prayer and time in God’s Word.”
The truth:
Growth and healing doesn’t happen by accident. We have to do the work. Just like "the knowing" that we need money to pay our bills doesn't do a thing to help us pay the bills. We have to actually go to get up and work and make the money.
The grace:
God meets us daily — in the ordinary and the ordinary moments. But the more intentional we are with spending time with Him... the more He is faithful to be present at all times with us.
Early in Thrive’s development, a wise mentor named Bill asked a profound question: He wasn’t familiar with 12-step recovery so, as we got to step 11, Bill was blown away... “How could daily devotion not be higher on the list?”
That question revealed something foundational to Thrive:
Traditional 12-Step programs were designed to lead people to faith — many of whom were not believers.
Thrive is designed for believers — people who already have Jesus, but who need growth, healing, and deep transformation.
Thrive is about John 10:10 life — abundant life.
As critical as Steps 1–3 are, it’s nearly impossible for someone struggling with identity, trauma, or spiritual disconnect to grow and heal without daily connection to God. Without it, God remains theoretical instead of relational. Without it, we rarely internalize who God says we are in Christ.
Daily devotion is not optional. It is how we:
Stay grounded in surrender
Recenter our identity in God’s truth
Renew our minds
Resist old patterns
Remain connected to the Healer
Core Realities Explored Here:
Do I view prayer and Scripture as lifelines or chores?
What distracts me from consistent time with God?
How do I respond when my path feels dry or distant?
Reflection Questions:
What lies get louder when I skip time with God?
What rhythms can I build that keep me rooted and connected?
How do I let God shape my daily life, not just my crises?
Why These 4 Pillars Matter Together
When someone begins to struggle, plateau, or feel distant from God, it’s almost always related to one of these first 4 Pillars:
They’ve begun to pick up control again — trying to manage an issue they can’t control.
They’ve forgotten that God is in control, and need to repent of trying to sit in God’s seat again.
They’ve stopped trusting God in all areas and reverted to old survival responses.
They’ve drifted from daily devotion — losing the grounding that sustains the other three pillars.
Daily connection isn’t just support — it’s the place where truth becomes identity, and belief becomes transformation. When neglect happens, the other steps weaken.
God is faithful — but only if we let Him. And we only let Him when we trust Him. And we only trust Him when we know Him. And we only know Him when we spend time with Him.
These four pillars are not a one-time checklist —they are a rhythm of life.They are the daily heartbeat of healing and abundant life in Christ.