Let's Talk About Joy
A Guide to Understanding Why Joy Sometimes Feels Out of Reach — and What We Can Do About It. A Companion Handout for the Thrive Teaching Series “Fruits of the Spirit.”
Scripture to Begin:"You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore." — Psalm 16:11 (ESV)
Section 1: When Joy Feels Missing
Let’s start by getting honest. Watch the YouTube video "Rat Race A Short Film Story by Steve Cutts." Does this reflect most of our lives? Chasing happy instead of ACTIVELY seeking Joy?
There are times when you’re doing all the “right” things: you pray, you worship, you serve, you read scripture—but something inside you still feels numb. The joy that scripture talks about—the kind that’s supposed to be your strength, your delight, your fruit—just isn’t there.
You’re not broken. You’re not failing.And most importantly, you are not alone.
This handout is here to help you explore why joy might feel distant right now—not just from a spiritual lens, but from the perspective of your brain, your body, and your daily life. Joy is holistic. It’s deeply spiritual, yes, but it is also impacted by biology, habits, medications, trauma, diet, and even relationships.
This isn’t about “fixing yourself.” It’s about becoming whole again—spirit, soul, and body—in partnership with God, wisdom, and community.
Section 2: Joy is a Fruit, Not a Feeling
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness..." — Galatians 5:22
Maybe you have heard it said:“Happiness is just your present set of circumstances minus your expectations.”Funny… and painfully true.
Happiness is based on what’s happening. Joy is based on Who’s present.Happiness can be taken away. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit—it’s grown from within when the Holy Spirit dwells in us.
In the Christian life, joy is not just a feeling—it’s a fruit of the Holy Spirit. That means it is not a product of our flesh or our circumstances. It is a product of the Holy Spirit within us. You don’t earn it or chase it. You cultivate it (meaning it grows in you and through you) by staying connected to the Vine—Jesus.
But here's the truth we don't often recognize: The Bible says the Joy of the Lord is our strength (Nehemiah 8:10). That means without joy, we are weak. Where there is no joy, we are easily defeated by our enemy. So, joy comes from the Holy Spirit as a product of His habitation (taking up residence in) in us. Joy is the strength we need to fight our battles. That means joy is not just desirable, it is mandatory. We must ASK the Holy Spirit to increase our joy... And, we must create a spiritual and physical environment where joy can grow and even THRIVE.
Remember: Even when joy is growing in your spirit, you might not “feel” it emotionally if your brain or body is struggling. That’s where this journey gets real. Your joy may be present spiritually but blocked emotionally or neurologically. So, let’s go deeper into why that happens.
Section 3: The Brain and Dopamine — Understanding Joy’s Chemistry
Dopamine is a neurotransmitter—a brain chemical—responsible for motivation, reward, and pleasure. It’s a big part of how we experience joy, satisfaction, and even spiritual delight. But when our brains are exposed to too many artificial dopamine “hits,” we can become dopamine-desensitized.
Here’s how it works:
· When you overindulge in dopamine-spiking behaviors (like constant social media, sugar, porn, alcohol, marijuana, even some medications), your brain starts to downregulate your dopamine receptors.
· That means over time, your brain stops responding as strongly to the things that used to bring you joy.
· The highs get duller. The lows stay long. And normal life feels boring or gray.
This is sometimes called “dopamine resistance”—and while it’s not always diagnosed that way medically, the reality is that many people experience a kind of emotional flat lining from chronic overstimulation.
Even good things—like prayer or relationships—can feel joyless when the brain is burnt out.
Section 4: The Body, Food, and Dopamine Resistance
Just like your body can become resistant to insulin, your brain can become resistant to dopamine,—the hormone that the “reward center” of the brain releases so that we feel happy.
How does that happen?
· Eating high-sugar, high-carb, low-nutrient foods causes repeated insulin spikes.
· Over time, the body stops responding properly to insulin.
· That leads to insulin resistance, which is linked to fatigue, brain fog, mood swings, inflammation, weight gain, and even depression.
· And just like dopamine resistance, insulin resistance can blunt your emotional and spiritual vitality.
·
Here’s what the research is starting to show:
Health researcher and human‑biology expert Gary Brecka has popularised the idea that excessive sugar intake and high‑stimulus behaviours impair our brain’s reward system. He notes that the brain begins producing insulin in response to sugar‑cravings and that over time this can dull our motivational/dopamine pathways.” Brecka goes on to say how modern tech and processed foods “are designed to exploit dopamine systems … Dopamine depletion leads to seeking increasingly intense stimuli for the same reward feeling.”
· People with insulin resistance and obesity often have fewer dopamine receptors.
· This means the brain’s ability to register pleasure and reward is reduced.
· That’s why some people say they feel like they’re always chasing a high they can’t catch—emotionally and physically.
So when you feel joyless, it might not just be spiritual stagnation. It might be your brain and body trying to recover from years of overload and poor nutrition.
Section 5: The Role of Medication and Self-Medication
Nots: This is not intended as medical advice. Simply facts that you may want to discuss with your medical professional.
Medications:
· Antidepressants, anti-anxiety medications, and mood stabilizers can be lifesaving.
· They often work by blunting emotional extremes—helping lift you out of despair or calm intrusive thoughts.
· But they can also dull the highs, making joy feel muted.
· This doesn’t mean you should stop taking your meds—but it’s important to be aware, and to bring this into conversation with your doctor and your spiritual community.
Self-Medication:
· Alcohol, marijuana, nicotine, food binges, and other numbing behaviors can mimic relief—but they come with a cost.
· They overstimulate your reward system and lead to further dopamine desensitization.
· Over time, you may need more of the substance or behavior just to feel “normal.”
· Eventually, even that won’t feel good anymore—and natural joy becomes nearly inaccessible.
· The very things you turn to for comfort might be the things blocking your joy.
Section 6: Finding Joy Again — Spirit-Led and Whole-Body Healing
So where do we go from here? Here’s the good news: Your brain can change. Your body can heal. And your spirit is already alive in Christ. Healing your joy is a Spirit-led process, but it includes practical stewardship of your thoughts, behaviors, diet, relationships, and rhythms.
Joy isn't a formula—it’s a fruit, a result of the Spirit’s ongoing work in us. But we can till the soil of our life to make room for that fruit to grow. Here’s how to take practical, Spirit-led steps toward finding joy—not by chasing feelings, but by cultivating the conditions where joy can thrive.
Invite the Holy Spirit:
· Joy is a fruit of the Spirit. Ask God: “Show me what’s blocking joy in my life.”
· Sit in silence. Open your heart. Ask for healing in your mind and body.
· “Ask and it shall be given unto you. Seek and you shall find.”
Examine Your Path.
Look honestly: Is what I’m doing producing life or draining it?
If your rhythms and relationships are joyless, don’t expect a different result doing the same things.
Detox your inputs.
· Reduce or eliminate dopamine-spiking habits for a season (screens, sugar, substances, social media).
· Replace them with time in nature, prayer, slow meals, worship, and face-to-face relationships.
· Stop binging TV/Podcasts/News that create a spirit of darkness, sin and dread.
· Guard Your Thought Life. Philippians 4:8 says to think on things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable
Find Someone to Love.
Joy is multiplied in connection. Serve, hug, call, pray for someone.
Science agrees with scripture: doing good for others literally lifts your spirit.
Consider: volunteering, writing encouragement notes, surprise generosity.
Heal your metabolism.
· Begin stabilizing blood sugar with whole foods, protein, fiber, and healthy fats.
· Reduce sugar, processed carbs, and overeating.
· Move your body gently and regularly.
Do What Awakens Your Spirit.
What activities make you feel alive in Christ? Do more of them.
It could be: walking in nature, worshiping, creating art, playing music, helping others, journaling. God works through beauty and joy to draw us closer.
Pray for Others, and Reach Out.
Intercessory prayer shifts your focus from self to service—and telling people you’ve prayed for them multiplies connection and joy.
Prune the Joy-Stealers.
Ask: Who or what is consistently robbing my peace?
This DOES mean limiting contact with toxic people, taking a break from news or social media, or cutting out habits that dull your spirit.
Nurture new habits: (It’s not a habit if it’s only done once)
· Practice gratitude—write down 3 things daily.
· Serve others with no expectation of return.
· Laugh. Listen to music. Dance. Plant something. Rest.
· Stay connected to healthy community.
Ask better questions:
· What am I chasing to feel better?
· What’s one habit I can surrender for 7 days to help my joy receptors reset?
· Who can walk this journey of restoration with me?
· How is the Holy Spirit inviting me into restoration—spiritually, emotionally, physically?
Section 7: What Joy Looks Like Now
Even after all this, remember: Joy might not feel like a spiritual fireworks show. Sometimes joy is quiet. It’s an anchor. It’s peace that defies your circumstances. It’s choosing to believe God is near, even when you don’t feel Him.
“Joy is not the absence of suffering. It is the presence of God.” — Unknown
You may be in a season of replanting. You may be detoxing from years of dopamine overload or insulin imbalance. You may be on medications that support your mental health, but make emotional highs less visible. That’s okay. God isn’t grading your joy. He is growing it.