"Unexpressed expectations are premeditated disappointments."
Scripture Foundation
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”— Isaiah 55:8–9 (NIV)
Session Focus:
We often enter recovery (discovery), growth, or new seasons with certain expectations—what healing will look like, how fast change will come, how people will support us. But when reality doesn’t match those expectations, we tend to get:
Disappointed
Offended
Discouraged
Ready to quit
God’s path often looks very different from what we planned—but it leads to freedom if we trust instead of control.
Key Quote for Reflection:
"Unexpressed expectations are premeditated disappointments."
These silent scripts we carry become blueprints for future bitterness.
When others (or even God) don’t meet expectations disappointment can grow into resentment.
1. Expectations vs. God's Process
· Our expectations are often shaped by pain, past experiences, or culture—not by God's promises.
· We expect comfort, speed, or predictability; God delivers transformation through discomfort, patience, and mystery.
· Example: The Israelites expected a conquering king; God sent a suffering servant.
2. The Offense of the Unexpected
· When things don’t go as expected, we become offended—at God, at others, even at ourselves.
· Scripture Insight: “Blessed is the one who is not offended by me.” (Matthew 11:6)
· Offense is often a sign that our expectations are out of alignment with God's method.
3. Quitting Too Soon
· Unmet expectations lead many to give up just before breakthrough.
· Galatians 6:9: "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."
4. We Want What We Want... But God Wants to Heal
· Our expectations are about outcomes. God is focused on transformation.
· The deeper question isn’t, “Why did this happen or why didn’t this happen?” but “What is God producing in me through this?”
Biblical Case Study: Naaman’s Healing (2 Kings 5:1–14)
Naaman: A mighty commander, honored and victorious—but plagued by leprosy.
A young servant girl in his household says there's a prophet in Israel (Elisha) who can heal him.
Naaman gathers riches, letters from the king, and travels with high expectation.
The Disruption:
Elisha doesn’t even come out to greet him—he sends a messenger.
The instructions: “Go wash in the Jordan River seven times.”
Naaman’s Response:
“But Naaman was angry and went away, saying, ‘Behold, I thought...’” (v.11)
That phrase—“I thought”—is the birthplace of many offenses.
He expected a dramatic miracle, not a simple obedience.
The Turning Point:
His servants gently urge him to obey—even if it seems beneath him.
He humbles himself, dips 7 times in the Jordan, and is completely healed.
Core Lessons from Naaman's Story
God’s methods often offend our pride.
Healing didn't come through status or spectacle—but through submission.
Our expectations often reveal our ego.
“I thought he would come out to me…” (status, attention, performance).
Obedience, not opinion, activates breakthrough.
Naaman’s healing came after he laid down his “I thought” and stepped into “God said.”
Other Biblical Examples of Misaligned Expectations
Moses – Exodus 3–4
Expected God to use someone else. Didn’t see himself as qualified.
God’s plan: "I will be with you."
Moses almost missed destiny because he expected it to look different.
Elijah – 1 Kings 19
Expected revival after Mt. Carmel. Instead, he got threats and isolation.
God meets him not in fire or wind, but in a gentle whisper.
His disappointment reveals expectations not grounded in God's long-term plan.
Disciples – Acts 1
Expected Jesus to “restore the kingdom to Israel” (Acts 1:6).
Jesus redirects: the Kingdom will come through Spirit-filled witnesses, not military might.
Mary & Martha – John 11
Expected Jesus to come heal Lazarus before he died.
Jesus delayed—and brought resurrection instead of healing.
They had to stretch their faith beyond what they understood.
Reflection Questions:
What are some expectations you’ve had about recovery, growth, or God’s timing that haven’t been met?
How have those unmet expectations shaped your attitude or faith walk?
What is your “I thought…” statement?
(e.g., “I thought my healing would come quicker…” “I thought people would support me…”)
What might God be inviting you to obey, even if it looks small, slow, or beneath your expectations?
Challenge This Week:
Write down some hidden expectations you've carried. (expectations you had that didn’t go the way you hoped—related to relationships, healing, recovery, or faith).
· What emotions did those unmet expectations trigger?
· How might God have been redirecting, protecting, or teaching through that situation?
Then pray: “God, I release my expectations. Help me trust Your process, not mine.”
Reframing Prompt:"What if God was giving you what you needed instead of what you expected?"
Encouragement & Closing Scripture
“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”— Galatians 6:9
“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine…”— Ephesians 3:20
God doesn’t disappoint—He often just delivers differently.